Smile Like You Mean It 1/?
Aug. 12th, 2008 06:42 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
oh_ameliaTitle: Smile Like You Mean It
Author: [Bad username or site: @ livejournal.com]
Beta:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
elyxer
Chapter: 1/?
Rating: NC-17 (overall)
Warnings: mpreg, crack!fic, cross-dressing, squick, Passions inspired. So not everything has to make sense. And since COWLIP can make things up I don't see why I can't.
Summary: It’s all about decisions, and how they can change your life. This is an AU of my AU fic The Perfidious Lover. You don't need to have read it to get this though. Just know that Nathan is MINE! :) *sees Rena coming and runs for my life!*
Disclaimer: QUEER AS FOLK is property of COWLIP and SHOWTIME. I own nothing.
Author’s Note: I don’t know what made me write a fic about everything I normally try to avoid, but I just couldn’t help it. No offense is meant to the people who LIKE to write serious mpreg fics. This is all in good fun.
Author's Note 2: This is NOT a B/J fic. It has no major pairing, but there is some B/J-ness in the background.
Status: WIP
Nathan nodded his head as he continued to doodle on his notepad. He had quit taking notes approximately four interviews ago. Each candidate seemed to get worse and worse. If he had to listen to one more list of everything that they wouldn’t do, he was going to go out of his mind.
“Well, thank you for coming Miss Anderson,” Nathan said as soon as the woman in front of him stopped speaking. “I still have some more interviews today, but you’re definitely at the top of the list.”
“That’s so great to hear, Mr. Echolls,” Miss Anderson said as she stood up, clutching her purse in the crook of her arm. She smiled all the way to the door and over enthusiastically shook Nathan’s hand before leaving.
He shut the door firmly and leaned his back against it. Only three more interviews left and the day from hell would be over. Brian and Justin definitely owed him big time for this.
“Ah, c’mon, Nathan, it’ll be fun. You know how much you enjoy torturing strangers,” he mimicked in Justin’s voice while doing an impersonation of Mikey’s whine. “Fun my ass,” he continued in his normal voice.
He cringed when he heard the knock at the door. After taking a deep breath, he opened the door.
“Hi there I’m Na—” Nathan lost his voice when he saw the woman standing in front of him. He couldn’t keep his eyes off of her as she made her way into the apartment. “I’m sorry,” he said, finding his voice. “I’m Nathan. You must be Amanda Greene.”
“I am,” Amanda answered as she tried to discreetly adjust her bra. “It’s very nice to meet you, Mr. Echolls.”
“Please, call me Nathan. Mr. Echolls is my father,” Nathan said as he sat down in his ‘interview’ chair and gestured for Amanda to take a seat on the couch.
“Okay, Nathan,” Amanda said as she sat down awkwardly on the couch. She adjusted the waist of her skirt and pulled on the hem. “New clothes,” she explained. “I’m trying out a new look.”
“Well, that’s always fun,” Nathan said with a small chuckle, wondering how bad her old look must have been if she thought this was an improvement. He picked up his notepad from the side table and tried to hide his cringe when he noticed a stray patch of thick hair above Amanda’s ankle. He shuddered wondering if this woman actually believed that au naturale was sexy.
“I’m opening a new door in my life, so I thought why not try a new wardrobe,” she said with a huge smile on her face as she pushed up her glasses.
Nathan nodded with a frozen smile on his face. He was surprised he didn’t notice it before, but now the dark hair surrounding Amanda’s lip really stood out. And her eyebrows were incredibly…connected. He suddenly didn’t trust his mouth to speak.
At the end of the interview he didn’t know whether to run and hide or take Amanda in his arms and give her a hug. One thing he did know was that he couldn’t deal with any more interviews.
“Well, thank you for coming by,” Nathan said as he stood up, stretching. “You’re definitely at the top of my list.”
“No, thank you, Nathan,” Amanda gushed as she pressed her hand to her chest. “You have no idea what this means to me,” she added as she blinked back tears. “Can I give you a hug?”
“Actually,” Nathan said as he took a step back. Looking back now, he really didn’t know what he was thinking when he was considering hugging this…woman. “How about a handshake?”
Amanda’s lips started to tremble and tears were forming in the corner of her eyes.
“To congratulate you on getting the job,” Nathan added quickly without thinking, holding out his hand. “I was gonna wait, but…”
“You mean it?!” Amanda broke into a huge toothy smile. “You really mean it?!”
“I mean it,” Nathan confirmed with a nervous smile on his face, his hands clenched tightly in his pockets.
“Oh thank you so much!” Amanda shrieked as she jumped into Nathan’s arms.
Nathan, for the first time in his life, cursed his fast reflexes.
~oo00oo~
“So what’ll it be, boys?” Debbie asked as she tapped her notepad with a pencil.
“I’m feeling a little daring today,” Emmett said as he scanned the menu. “So let me have an order of the baby back ribs.”
“And I’ll have a bacon cheeseburger, chili cheese fries, and a chocolate shake,” Justin said, handing his menu to Debbie.
“You’re gonna get fat,” Brian sing-songed.
“Teddy?” Deb asked as she continued to write down the orders.
“I’ll have the tuna—”
“Tuna fish on white,” Emmett filled in.
“Double mayo,” Deb continued.
“Potato chips and coleslaw,” Brian added.
“And vanilla pudding,” Justin finished.
“Christ, am I really that predictable?” Ted asked as he handed his menu to Debbie.
“Not predictable,” Brian said as he mockingly patted Ted’s hand. “Just reliable.”
“Says Mr. Turkey-sandwich-on-whole-wheat-no-mayo,” Deb said with a laugh.
“It’s whole grain,” Brian retorted lamely.
“Whole grain,” Debbie repeated slowly as she finished writing down the order.
“So how do you think she’s holding up?” Ted asked once Debbie was out of earshot.
“I don’t know,” Emmett sighed, shaking his head. “I think the longest Michael was ever away from home was when he went away for a weekend with David. Now that he’s in Philadelphia with Ben…”
“You know how Deb is,” Justin said with a sigh as he glanced toward the kitchen. “She’s always putting on a brave face.”
“Speaking of brave faces,” Brian said, sitting up straighter in the booth. “Check out what just walked in.”
Ted and Emmett looked up just in time to see a woman in a plaid pink skirt, orange striped blouse, and large chunky sandals. She tripped and almost fell when one of the straps on her sandal broke.
Emmett hid his gasp with his hand, but his eyes still gave away what he was thinking.
“Oh, my God,” Ted said, his mouth hanging open.
“Hey, Ted, is that your sister that just walked in?” Brian asked with a snicker.
“Brian,” Justin said as he slapped the back of his hand on Brian’s stomach.
“A little lower, Sunshine,” Brian said as he grabbed Justin’s hand and placed it on his crotch. “And it’s Brian,” he added with a low moan.
“Spare us, please,” Ted said as he rolled his eyes. “And another thing, that woman makes my sister look like a model.”
“She makes ugly drag queens look like Marilyn Monroe.” Brian cringed when he took a second glance at the offending woman. “And at least they have a dick to fall back on.”
“Oh, look,” Ted said, nodding towards the counter, “I think she found a friend.”
Emmett and Brian looked and saw the woman talking to Debbie.
“Which one should we feel worse for?” Emmett asked with a worried look on his face.
“Hey, guys,” Nathan greeted as he slid into the booth next to Justin. “What’s up?”
“Oh, we were just discussing that…vision over there,” Brian answered.
“And what’s the verdict?” Nathan asked.
“We’re sure she must have a great personality,” Justin interrupted before anyone else could answer.
“Actually, she doesn’t,” Nathan corrected his best friend.
“Do you know her?” Ted asked.
“Did Rena smarten up and finally dump your ass?” Brian asked with a smile on his face.
“Yes, I do and no, she didn’t,” Nathan answered, slapping the back of Brian’s head.
“Watch the hair,” Brian warned as he smoothed his mussed hair.
“I apologize,” Nathan said with an insincere smile. “I know that in your advanced age losing hair can be quite traumatic, but let me give you some advice. Either buy a hat to wear out, or practice the comb over a little more,” he added as he pointed to the back of Brian’s head.
“Fuck you,” Brian said with a smile while lifting his middle finger.
“You had your chance.” Nathan grinned.
“So are you gonna tell us how you know her or not?” Ted asked anxiously.
“Of course.” Nathan took a deep breath and smiled. “Guys, I’d like you to meet Amanda Greene. Also known as Brian and Justin’s new cleaning lady.”
“What the fuck?” Brian spit his water out all over Ted.
~oo00oo~
Amanda clutched her purse with one hand and her take-out from the diner in the other. She blinked back the tears as she made her way to her apartment. Even though she didn’t let on, she’d heard every single word from that booth in the diner.
Finally getting sick of hearing the clomp clomp of her broken sandal, she kicked them off and carried them the rest of the way. The sidewalk was a warm welcome underneath her feet. The moan she let out caught her a few unwanted glances, but she didn’t care. The walk up to her apartment was exhausting after a long day, and had her reconsidering how great a deal it was. Sure the rent was cheaper without an elevator, but was the six-floor walk up and down everyday worth it?
Amanda dropped her shoes next to the door and flung her purse on the couch before heading to the kitchen. She took a plate from the cabinet and dumped her burger and fries on it. Her skirt kept hitching up, so she decided to change into something more comfortable before eating her dinner. She liked it better cold anyway.
As she made her way to the bedroom, she unbuttoned her skirt and shirt, letting them fall to the floor. After pulling on a pair of sweatpants, she headed to the bathroom to wash the make-up off of her face.
Looking in the mirror, she shook her head, not believing the predicament she had gotten herself into. She pulled off her wig hooked it on the back of the bathroom door. The short hair that greeted her was becoming a little bit longer, and soon she might not even need the wig.
After she finished washing her face, she removed the most offending garment of all. Her bra. She unhooked the clasp and two pudding filled balloons dropped to the floor.
“Finally,” she sighed as she rubbed her sore shoulders. She gripped the sides of the sink and took a deep breath before looking in the mirror again. This was always the hardest part. Looking in the mirror after all the clothes came off she was forced to face reality. “Michael Novotny, what have you got yourself into?”
Chapter 2
Author: [Bad username or site: @ livejournal.com]
Beta:
elyxerChapter: 1/?
Rating: NC-17 (overall)
Warnings: mpreg, crack!fic, cross-dressing, squick, Passions inspired. So not everything has to make sense. And since COWLIP can make things up I don't see why I can't.
Summary: It’s all about decisions, and how they can change your life. This is an AU of my AU fic The Perfidious Lover. You don't need to have read it to get this though. Just know that Nathan is MINE! :) *sees Rena coming and runs for my life!*
Disclaimer: QUEER AS FOLK is property of COWLIP and SHOWTIME. I own nothing.
Author’s Note: I don’t know what made me write a fic about everything I normally try to avoid, but I just couldn’t help it. No offense is meant to the people who LIKE to write serious mpreg fics. This is all in good fun.
Author's Note 2: This is NOT a B/J fic. It has no major pairing, but there is some B/J-ness in the background.
Status: WIP
Nathan nodded his head as he continued to doodle on his notepad. He had quit taking notes approximately four interviews ago. Each candidate seemed to get worse and worse. If he had to listen to one more list of everything that they wouldn’t do, he was going to go out of his mind.
“Well, thank you for coming Miss Anderson,” Nathan said as soon as the woman in front of him stopped speaking. “I still have some more interviews today, but you’re definitely at the top of the list.”
“That’s so great to hear, Mr. Echolls,” Miss Anderson said as she stood up, clutching her purse in the crook of her arm. She smiled all the way to the door and over enthusiastically shook Nathan’s hand before leaving.
He shut the door firmly and leaned his back against it. Only three more interviews left and the day from hell would be over. Brian and Justin definitely owed him big time for this.
“Ah, c’mon, Nathan, it’ll be fun. You know how much you enjoy torturing strangers,” he mimicked in Justin’s voice while doing an impersonation of Mikey’s whine. “Fun my ass,” he continued in his normal voice.
He cringed when he heard the knock at the door. After taking a deep breath, he opened the door.
“Hi there I’m Na—” Nathan lost his voice when he saw the woman standing in front of him. He couldn’t keep his eyes off of her as she made her way into the apartment. “I’m sorry,” he said, finding his voice. “I’m Nathan. You must be Amanda Greene.”
“I am,” Amanda answered as she tried to discreetly adjust her bra. “It’s very nice to meet you, Mr. Echolls.”
“Please, call me Nathan. Mr. Echolls is my father,” Nathan said as he sat down in his ‘interview’ chair and gestured for Amanda to take a seat on the couch.
“Okay, Nathan,” Amanda said as she sat down awkwardly on the couch. She adjusted the waist of her skirt and pulled on the hem. “New clothes,” she explained. “I’m trying out a new look.”
“Well, that’s always fun,” Nathan said with a small chuckle, wondering how bad her old look must have been if she thought this was an improvement. He picked up his notepad from the side table and tried to hide his cringe when he noticed a stray patch of thick hair above Amanda’s ankle. He shuddered wondering if this woman actually believed that au naturale was sexy.
“I’m opening a new door in my life, so I thought why not try a new wardrobe,” she said with a huge smile on her face as she pushed up her glasses.
Nathan nodded with a frozen smile on his face. He was surprised he didn’t notice it before, but now the dark hair surrounding Amanda’s lip really stood out. And her eyebrows were incredibly…connected. He suddenly didn’t trust his mouth to speak.
At the end of the interview he didn’t know whether to run and hide or take Amanda in his arms and give her a hug. One thing he did know was that he couldn’t deal with any more interviews.
“Well, thank you for coming by,” Nathan said as he stood up, stretching. “You’re definitely at the top of my list.”
“No, thank you, Nathan,” Amanda gushed as she pressed her hand to her chest. “You have no idea what this means to me,” she added as she blinked back tears. “Can I give you a hug?”
“Actually,” Nathan said as he took a step back. Looking back now, he really didn’t know what he was thinking when he was considering hugging this…woman. “How about a handshake?”
Amanda’s lips started to tremble and tears were forming in the corner of her eyes.
“To congratulate you on getting the job,” Nathan added quickly without thinking, holding out his hand. “I was gonna wait, but…”
“You mean it?!” Amanda broke into a huge toothy smile. “You really mean it?!”
“I mean it,” Nathan confirmed with a nervous smile on his face, his hands clenched tightly in his pockets.
“Oh thank you so much!” Amanda shrieked as she jumped into Nathan’s arms.
Nathan, for the first time in his life, cursed his fast reflexes.
“So what’ll it be, boys?” Debbie asked as she tapped her notepad with a pencil.
“I’m feeling a little daring today,” Emmett said as he scanned the menu. “So let me have an order of the baby back ribs.”
“And I’ll have a bacon cheeseburger, chili cheese fries, and a chocolate shake,” Justin said, handing his menu to Debbie.
“You’re gonna get fat,” Brian sing-songed.
“Teddy?” Deb asked as she continued to write down the orders.
“I’ll have the tuna—”
“Tuna fish on white,” Emmett filled in.
“Double mayo,” Deb continued.
“Potato chips and coleslaw,” Brian added.
“And vanilla pudding,” Justin finished.
“Christ, am I really that predictable?” Ted asked as he handed his menu to Debbie.
“Not predictable,” Brian said as he mockingly patted Ted’s hand. “Just reliable.”
“Says Mr. Turkey-sandwich-on-whole-wheat-no-mayo,” Deb said with a laugh.
“It’s whole grain,” Brian retorted lamely.
“Whole grain,” Debbie repeated slowly as she finished writing down the order.
“So how do you think she’s holding up?” Ted asked once Debbie was out of earshot.
“I don’t know,” Emmett sighed, shaking his head. “I think the longest Michael was ever away from home was when he went away for a weekend with David. Now that he’s in Philadelphia with Ben…”
“You know how Deb is,” Justin said with a sigh as he glanced toward the kitchen. “She’s always putting on a brave face.”
“Speaking of brave faces,” Brian said, sitting up straighter in the booth. “Check out what just walked in.”
Ted and Emmett looked up just in time to see a woman in a plaid pink skirt, orange striped blouse, and large chunky sandals. She tripped and almost fell when one of the straps on her sandal broke.
Emmett hid his gasp with his hand, but his eyes still gave away what he was thinking.
“Oh, my God,” Ted said, his mouth hanging open.
“Hey, Ted, is that your sister that just walked in?” Brian asked with a snicker.
“Brian,” Justin said as he slapped the back of his hand on Brian’s stomach.
“A little lower, Sunshine,” Brian said as he grabbed Justin’s hand and placed it on his crotch. “And it’s Brian,” he added with a low moan.
“Spare us, please,” Ted said as he rolled his eyes. “And another thing, that woman makes my sister look like a model.”
“She makes ugly drag queens look like Marilyn Monroe.” Brian cringed when he took a second glance at the offending woman. “And at least they have a dick to fall back on.”
“Oh, look,” Ted said, nodding towards the counter, “I think she found a friend.”
Emmett and Brian looked and saw the woman talking to Debbie.
“Which one should we feel worse for?” Emmett asked with a worried look on his face.
“Hey, guys,” Nathan greeted as he slid into the booth next to Justin. “What’s up?”
“Oh, we were just discussing that…vision over there,” Brian answered.
“And what’s the verdict?” Nathan asked.
“We’re sure she must have a great personality,” Justin interrupted before anyone else could answer.
“Actually, she doesn’t,” Nathan corrected his best friend.
“Do you know her?” Ted asked.
“Did Rena smarten up and finally dump your ass?” Brian asked with a smile on his face.
“Yes, I do and no, she didn’t,” Nathan answered, slapping the back of Brian’s head.
“Watch the hair,” Brian warned as he smoothed his mussed hair.
“I apologize,” Nathan said with an insincere smile. “I know that in your advanced age losing hair can be quite traumatic, but let me give you some advice. Either buy a hat to wear out, or practice the comb over a little more,” he added as he pointed to the back of Brian’s head.
“Fuck you,” Brian said with a smile while lifting his middle finger.
“You had your chance.” Nathan grinned.
“So are you gonna tell us how you know her or not?” Ted asked anxiously.
“Of course.” Nathan took a deep breath and smiled. “Guys, I’d like you to meet Amanda Greene. Also known as Brian and Justin’s new cleaning lady.”
“What the fuck?” Brian spit his water out all over Ted.
Amanda clutched her purse with one hand and her take-out from the diner in the other. She blinked back the tears as she made her way to her apartment. Even though she didn’t let on, she’d heard every single word from that booth in the diner.
Finally getting sick of hearing the clomp clomp of her broken sandal, she kicked them off and carried them the rest of the way. The sidewalk was a warm welcome underneath her feet. The moan she let out caught her a few unwanted glances, but she didn’t care. The walk up to her apartment was exhausting after a long day, and had her reconsidering how great a deal it was. Sure the rent was cheaper without an elevator, but was the six-floor walk up and down everyday worth it?
Amanda dropped her shoes next to the door and flung her purse on the couch before heading to the kitchen. She took a plate from the cabinet and dumped her burger and fries on it. Her skirt kept hitching up, so she decided to change into something more comfortable before eating her dinner. She liked it better cold anyway.
As she made her way to the bedroom, she unbuttoned her skirt and shirt, letting them fall to the floor. After pulling on a pair of sweatpants, she headed to the bathroom to wash the make-up off of her face.
Looking in the mirror, she shook her head, not believing the predicament she had gotten herself into. She pulled off her wig hooked it on the back of the bathroom door. The short hair that greeted her was becoming a little bit longer, and soon she might not even need the wig.
After she finished washing her face, she removed the most offending garment of all. Her bra. She unhooked the clasp and two pudding filled balloons dropped to the floor.
“Finally,” she sighed as she rubbed her sore shoulders. She gripped the sides of the sink and took a deep breath before looking in the mirror again. This was always the hardest part. Looking in the mirror after all the clothes came off she was forced to face reality. “Michael Novotny, what have you got yourself into?”
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2008-08-13 01:56 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-08-13 11:38 pm (UTC)There won't be too much B/J in this, but I hope you'll stick around for it anyway. :)
no subject
Date: 2008-08-13 11:39 pm (UTC)Thanks so much for reviewing. It means so much to me. :)
no subject
Date: 2008-08-13 10:40 am (UTC)I can't comment too much because I'm afraid I'll give something away with the story, but I just wanted to say again...I love your mind. I love how it works; I love how evil it can be. Great job!
Hugs!
no subject
Date: 2008-08-13 11:41 pm (UTC)*hugs*
no subject
Date: 2008-08-14 01:28 am (UTC)The diner scene was wonderful by the way, I could envision it perfectly. Great job!
no subject
Date: 2008-08-14 01:33 am (UTC)Thanks so much for reviewing!
no subject
Date: 2008-08-14 03:30 am (UTC)But Michael in drag, interviewing to clean Brian and Justin's place??? lol I just may have almost fallen off my chair laughing. *giggles* Can't wait to hear what brought this on.
no subject
Date: 2008-08-14 03:37 am (UTC)I love putting Nathan in uncomfortable situations. It is so much fun.
And as for Michael's situation... all will be explained very soon.
no subject
Date: 2008-09-17 02:34 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-09-17 03:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-10-05 06:12 pm (UTC)